The nuclear option

Dear Lifehacker,

Every afternoon around 4 o’clock I drag myself over to the office Coke machine for a much-needed kick after a post-lunch crash. I know how ridiculously addictive Coke and coffee is, and how quickly one can fall into the habit of needing caffeine just to get through the day.

So how the @#%! do I wean myself off this crap? Vitamin B? Frequent breaks to walk around? That old “drink water, it’ll wake you up” theory only goes so far.

There’s got to be a better way. Please help!

Sincerely,
Caf Fiend

Answer in the post. And I'll attest to all the cold-turkey withdrawl symptoms. Oh, will I ever.