Under anesthetic, subdivided and synthetic

And I got more work done on my terrible face; I got two telephone-pole-like posts put in about an inch deep into bone. They ain't comin' out. They may be the most stable part of my body right now. But the stitches tickle and it's still more than a bit painful, and I just ran outta meds. This is on course to becoming the worst Christmas vacation ever, of Griswoldian proportions. Joy to the goddamn world.

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Not an entirely festive occasion here. Sue me.

This is your present. I didn't wrap it.

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Yes, a merry Christmas indeed. My God, you can really hear the geese.

All I want for Christmas is to never hear anything about "Festivus" again, and a Super Bowl XLI win for the Bolts. I've done my time in pigskin purgatory, okay? Two words: Ryan Leaf. Here's hoping the holidays bring y'all whatever your wants or needs call for. ( 56 pics below.... )

Okay. I tried to tolerate the Christmas ads before November. The occasional Christmas carol on the radio. The inevitable influx of Christmas merchandise before the Halloween candy's cleaned from the shelves.

But sweet Cylon Baby Jesus (™ norabombay), what is How the Grinch Stole Christmas doing on TV on TBS on November 12? Is it any wonder how a holiday spirit can be so diluted and inconsequential when it's celebrated for 1/6th of the entire year? With Thanksgiving so close to Christmas, it serves as a perfect buffer and milepost from which the actual festivity could start -- if anything, you could argue that a month of pre-holiday mirth is still erring on the side of overkill.

And if it's this distressing to me, I can hardly imagine how pleasant it is for my friends either from or now in non-Christian households. I feel yuir pain. Christmas and I have never really been on talking terms, but right now, if I see Christmas in a crosswalk in front of me, I won't even brake.